Say it with me now,

This is not my church.

Church is not about me.

My pastor is not out to get me.

We’ve been chatting about the mindset shifts we all need to make for the sake of the church and reflection of Christ. Here is one more along with an action plan we all need to consider: My pastor has been called to be my pastor and I need to follow.

Your pastor has been hand-picked.

We’ve been through the pastor search committee process three times now. All of these committees were either close to or over a year in the process when Chris was finally called to the position. If you’ve ever been on a search committee, you know what long and difficult work it is. In case you haven’t let me paint you a picture of how much effort those team members put in.

Even a small church might get 50 applicants. Some of the really large churches receive thousands of applications. This last job Chris accepted had around 400 applicants. That’s 400 applications that were read through, considered, and narrowed down … which brought them to the end of the first round of eliminations and dozens more rounds to go. Every search committee narrows the applicants down using different methods, but they all (if the committee is doing their job well) include researching (which would include things like a bit of Facebook stalking), reference checking, follow-up interviews via email, phone, and/or Skype, completing background checks, and sometimes traveling to view the pastor in his current church. Countless sermons are listened to, tons of discussions are held at their committee meetings, and many, many hours of prayer are put in.

From the other side of things, it feels a lot like American Idol. At first, we are just another number in the masses. Then we make it to the top 24, then 12, then the final 3. At this point, there is usually another round of interviews, often including me (SIDE NOTE: There aren’t many other jobs where an interview with the wife and a consideration of what she “brings to the table” is normal. But it is very much expected in this process.) Sometimes we’ve been picked, and sometimes the team decides to go with someone else.

Here’s my point: This is not applying for a job at Burger King and getting hired on the spot. It is a long, drawn out, prayerful, Spirit-led process. But it is a year-long journey (again, if the team is doing their job) that God uses to guide a church to the man He has chosen for them, and vice versa. So when you begin to second-guess your pastor’s decision making, preaching style, walk with God, and facial hair choices, remember that he has been appointed by God to be your pastor. He’s been called to serve God through this unique role, which includes leading your church toward God’s will.

Your pastor has been equipped.

Just in case the fact that the man you call pastor has been hand-picked and called to be right where he is right now isn’t  enough to get you to follow him, pray for him, and support him in every way you can, here’s one more thing to consider: He’s been trained to do this job! Now, I know not all pastors have been to seminary, but the vast majority of them have. They have attended classes, read books, and written papers all about how to do their job. They’ve hit on topics such as how to deal with the difficult people in their churches that just won’t follow…

In just about every other arena, someone who tells someone else how to do their job is considered rude. In the church arena it’s unfortunately, it’s considered common.

Your pastor deserves to be listened to, respected, and followed.

It should go without saying that your pastor is not perfect. He will make mistakes and have mixed motives. But just because he’s not perfect doesn’t mean you get to disrespect him.

I am not calling for congregants to shut up and sit down. I am calling for the people of God to consider that the man of God behind the pulpit has feelings, too. And there is not much that will take the wind out of his sails than pews filled with people who refuse to trust him. Who chose to just drag their feet until he picks up and leaves. Or worse—who manipulate, plot, and make life as difficult as possible in order to force him out.

If you want him to boldly lead you through the big stuff, let him lead you through the little. If he meets resistance at every corner … and if all he’s tried to do so far is update the toilet paper dispensers in the bathroom and spruce up the website … it’s going to be really hard for him to believe that you are going to follow him through the important decisions that are going to lead to the lost walking through the doors of the church.

Lord, give us mercy.

4 replies
  1. Nina
    Nina says:

    And after serving in several churches they also have tons of hands on experience that can never be taught in a class. Nor could any class ever prepare any pastor for some of the things they have to face when on the “job”. Plus, as a side note; it is not just a “job”. It is indeed a calling to a family of believers which the majority of pastors’ families desparately need since they are typically far away from their real families and rarely get opportunities to visit family because they “work” every weekend. Just some thoughts that came to my head as I read. ❤

    Reply
  2. Susan Hand
    Susan Hand says:

    Truth well said.Wish every church member would read this with heart wide open.

    Reply
  3. Jen
    Jen says:

    As a fellow pastor’s wife, let me just add my “Amen!” to this. 🙂 What you “see” your pastor invest at the church building is only the tip of the iceberg of the time he spends investing in your church family. We need more people willing to serve sacrificially alongside their pastors and pastors’ families. I’m so thankful for the church members in our life who recognize the burden of ministry, and who do all they can to help relieve some of the burden. 🙂

    Reply

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